By Kenneth Ottinger

It is a strange thing, this life, we, as intelligent, conscience beings live. On the one hand we yearn for the creature comforts that “civilized” society affords. On the other we are a roiling mass of emotions and impulse, forever seeking discomfort and the challenge. Every individual I know fancies themselves a master of their own life, in their own right. All searching for meaning and purpose when there is none to be found. Perhaps the journey is the true purpose.

From the moment we are conceived, our lives are a battle against the odds. Everything from prenatal injury and disease to abortion, and possibly fetal suicide, is working against us to ensure that only the strongest can survive. Once we are free of the womb, free of the bonds of maternal protection, can we truly seek out our own purpose. How do we define that purpose? The vast majority define it through the external world. Allowing those we have never met and those who care naught for our well being to determine what the goals and aspirations of our lives should be. Graduate college,  seek enlightenment,buy a house, be one with nature, own a flashy new car, align our chakras, get that promotion, build the new earthship, finish your doctorate, these are all goals and aspirations thrust upon mankind through outside forces, none of which come from the inner, from the true place of peace and serenity, but, only a place of emptiness, a place of neglect.

We, as a free humanity should not look to compare ourselves to the rest of society, but rather, compare ourselves to our own moral compass. Define our true being by what we subjectively find true. Every individual has their own pathway to walk, and find, and once we do, once you find that avenue that resonates with your true being, you have a choice to make. Do you take the courageous route and walk it, regardless of the precariousness, heedless to the stygian depths that threaten to overwhelm ones senses at every step? Or, in haste, do you retreat to the safety and security of the maternal bosom? Both paths are correct, both paths are folly. The determining factor is your own views. Can one tolerate not challenging oneself? If you can, all the better for you. If you cannot, do not trouble yourself with the whither to’s and the why for’s, NAY, embrace your own path. Walk with your head held high, for your choice is your own to make, and no judgment is legitimate, lest you allow it to be, lest you choose for that judgment to reflect upon your soul.

WE WANT THE WHIP!! — an oft forgotten funeral chant, but one which has immense meaning. Society will, if one lets it, devour us whole.  It will deposit the remains in the darkest and deepest crevices on earth. The Marianas Trench is but a paltry crater compared to the depths to which we can allow ourselves to be expelled, upon the whims of “civilized” society. The Colosseum, the NFL, both alike in grandeur and congregation, are but a representation of the banal, base nature which still resides in the hearts of humanity. If it is such an existence one seeks, then seek it, with the whole of your being. Do not hide your visage in shame. Do not acquiesce to the reproach and ridicule of those who do not know their own hearts. Rejoice! For you have found your rapture. You have found your purpose.

If yours is the path of the courageous, know that you will be tried. The tenacity of your heart will be called forward to do battle with the timidness of your mind. Only you can decide for yourself when you have faltered. Only you can decide when you have succeeded. Riches and fame are but a drop in the bucket for the truly dauntless. Money dissipates, fame is fleeting. The reward you seek will not be in gold or fans, but rather in the knowledge that you did not quit. You pushed yourself to what you viewed as your breaking point and beyond.  Your true requital will be the ability to persevere, the proficiency in success.

What ever choice you make in life, believe in that choice, and hold to it. We can not yet turn back the clocks, and so must choose again, at the next fork in our path, ever onward to infinity … and beyond.

With Love

Fenix